WOODLAND HILLS, Calif. –– They laughed at the Texans’ mascot. They giggled at Trevor Lawrence’s hair. They howled at the sight of 49ers fans fleeing up escalators like panicked prairie dogs.
The Los Angeles Rams’ 2025 schedule release was more than a reveal—it was a roast, a riot, a rollicking romp through the NFL’s ego-filled funhouse. And in true Los Angeles fashion, it was all sweat and sarcasm, a Hollywood spectacle where the jokes hit harder than Aaron Donald in his prime.
Brenda Song, queen of deadpan, anchored the first video like a late-night host skewering monologue targets. Even Cooper Kupp, a beloved former Ram, wasn’t spared—his former team clowned him because, in L.A., loyalty means laughing at your heroes before you laugh with them.
Current players reacted to memes like theater critics dissing a B-list play. Steve Avila squinted at Jelly Roll’s Titans jersey like it was a math problem.
“The Whiners,” Avila muttered, a single syllable dripping with 70 years of rivalry.
But the schedule itself? A stand-up routine with a punchline only a masochist could love.
Four primetime games? More like four chances to remind America why West Coast bedtimes are a myth.
A London trip in Week 7? A bye week that’s less a vacation than a coma after jet lag’s sucker punch. Five division games in the season’s second half? The NFL might as well have handed the Rams a grenade and whispered, “Good luck defusing this in December.”
They’ll open against Houston, a team whose mascot was mocked but whose quarterback, C.J. Stroud, remains unmockable. They’ll face Philly in Week 3, a reunion with the Eagles’ confetti still stuck in their cleats from last January’s heartbreak.
Then comes the gauntlet: two Thursdays lit by Amazon’s cold glow, five road games in the torrid stretch run, and a December Monday night in Atlanta, where the Falcons’ curse is the only thing chillier than the dome’s AC.
No cold-weather games? Please. This schedule is a blizzard of absurdity.
The Rams’ social media team, pranksters and poets, turned foes into memes and mascots into punchlines.
The joke? The schedule’s brutal geometry—a zigzag of 10 a.m. body clocks, a desert of home games between October and November, a finale against Arizona that might as well be played in a TBD time warp. It’s the Coliseum chaos repackaged for the TikTok age: glamorous, grueling, and gloriously unserious.
Yet here’s the beauty—the Rams, ever the auteurs, framed it all with a smirk. They trolled the Titans with a country star, roasted the Niners with escalator shame and turned the Seahawks into a late-night sideshow. They weaponized wit because, in L.A., even the grind must have glitter.
So raise a glass to the schedule-makers, those unheralded sadists. Raise a glass to the Rams, who’ll tackle this trek with the same audacity they troll it. Because in a league of scripted drama, they’ve written themselves a dark comedy—one part satire, two parts survival and a whole lot of NFC West tears.
The road to the playoffs? More like a tightrope walk over a pit of banana peels. But if anyone can turn slapstick into a spectacle, it’s these Rams. Don’t blame them if they’re too busy laughing to notice the fall.
Los Angeles Rams 2025 regular season schedule
- Week 1: Sunday, Sept. 7, vs. Houston Texans, 4:25 p.m. ET, CBS
- Week 2: Sunday, Sept. 14, at Tennessee Titans, 1 p.m. ET, CBS
- Week 3: Sunday, Sept. 21, at Philadelphia Eagles, 1 p.m. ET, FOX
- Week 4: Sunday, Sept. 28, vs. Indianapolis Colts, 4:05 p.m. ET, FOX
- Week 5: Thursday, Oct. 2, vs. San Francisco 49ers, 8:15 p.m. ET, Prime
- Week 6: Sunday, Oct. 12, at Baltimore Ravens, 1 p.m. ET, FOX
- Week 7: Sunday, Oct. 19, at Jacksonville Jaguars (London), 9:30 a.m., NFL Network
- Week 8: Bye
- Week 9: Sunday, Nov. 2, vs. New Orleans Saints, 4:05 p.m. ET, FOX
- Week 10: Sunday, Nov. 9, at San Francisco 49ers, 4:25 p.m. ET, FOX
- Week 11: Sunday, Nov. 16, vs. Seattle Seahawks, 4:05 p.m. ET, FOX
- Week 12: Sunday, Nov. 23, vs. Tampa Bay Buccaneers, 8:20 p.m. ET, NBC
- Week 13: Sunday, Nov. 30, at Carolina Panthers, 1 p.m. ET, FOX
- Week 14: Sunday, Dec. 7, at Arizona Cardinals, 4:25 p.m. ET, FOX
- Week 15: Sunday, Dec. 14, vs. Detroit Lions, 4:25 p.m. ET, FOX
- Week 16: Thursday, Dec. 18, at Seattle Seahawks, 8:15 p.m. ET, Prime
- Week 17: Monday, Dec. 29, at Atlanta Falcons, 8:15 p.m. ET, ESPN
- Week 18: Date/time TBD, vs. Arizona Cardinals